Hey there!
I'm writing this from the library. I literally needed to kill like 45 minutes before my next class, and my phone's about to die, so I thought that this would be a wonderful opportunity to check in on my blog buddies? How's it going? Are you doing alright? I hope so.
It's been weird, honestly, these past few weeks. Well, if you want the whole truth, I must admit that this entire semester has been crazy. I don't know... I feel so lost inside my own head. It's like I'm no longer controlling myself. I used to feel so free, so in-charge. But it's as though my vices are controlling me as they once did. I hope that this won't affect my ability to succeed in my courses, as I'm gonna need to boost my GPA in order to take some Communication classes next semester.
Other than that, though, I must say that I have been enjoying myself. I've had fun, although I haven't really hung out with anyone. Maybe I need to make some more friends. I feel like I've shut myself out from everyone. It's not bad, however, because I really don't care for the people I'm around on a day-to-day basis. It's really hard to stay motivated to do the responsible thing on my own; my own mind isn't the best source of will power in my humble opinion.
I've been working on the aforementioned love story for my writing class, and I feel as though it's gonna turn out pretty well. It's due tomorrow, but I made sure to get a head-start on it, so I was able to write it little by little throughout the week. Now, the story took an unexpected turn (as creative writing pieces tend to), and I feel that I am at least proud enough of the story to share it with you guys. I told you that I wouldn't post it because I thought it'd be so cliché considering how much of a running theme "love" is on this blog. I really didn't want to subject any potential readers, or even my future self, to the love-drunk monstrosity I was planning to create. Fortunately, I think I took a good route in terms of writing a classic, sweet love story. Unlike the previous story, I think it's very simple and effective. I'm putting the finishing touches on it tonight, but there's one major problem. Well, I hate saying this, but I don't have a name for the story. Yup, that's right! I'm drawing a blank. But then again, it was never a problem before. I'm sure I'll come up with something! I'll give you guys the details of the story if you're interested in reading it in the next blog entry. :)
Not straying too far from the topic of love, however, I want to address a post that I made around Christmas time. Well, in short, I mentioned a girl that I could potentially be interested in, and it seemed like things might have gone somewhere, but I just couldn't take it. I think I've raised my standards considerably over the years, and I can't help but think that the girl I was interested in (her name is Autumn) is a total balloon.
When I say balloon, I intend it to mean precisely what you'd imagine it to mean: stupid, bitchy and exhibiting qualities of a drama queen. Now, I don't mean any offence to her, but I just don't know. I think I know my type of girl, and she's not it. I really wish I sad some kind of sixth-sense that could give me sort of a vibe about a girl's personality, but alas, that would make the hunt far too simple. The thing is, I really don't want any girl like that. It's simply a preference. I just kinda want a cool chick who's funny and someone I can talk to. I want someone who can be an emotional crutch for me when I need it, as I intend to do for her when she needs it. It's hard to explain, but reading that paragraph back made me sound like a total misogynist asshole, but I'm not gonna change it, as it's the best way to word it. I just wanted to make sure that you get what I'm saying. xD
I think I'll break the post off here. It's unusual for me, but I actually have a lot more that I'd liek to get off my chest. It's just that I'm gonna need to get to class in about 20 minutes, so I figure I'd start heading there now!
It feels good to vent. If you made it this far, I want you to know that you're really special to me. And because you're special, I want to reward you with something!
A thank you.
Hope it's worth something :)
~Jacob
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